Here's my rant about hipsters...

Yes! I do not like hipsters! I have to say, they may even contribute to my repressed issues! It's not my fault! Society dictates that I shouldn't dropkick everybody that annoys me. I have a slight violent tendency so excuse me... But mostly, as my sister puts it, they just try too hard and really give me a lot of inner chuckling material. So really, they benefit my life.

Just think about it... 15 years ago, you would have been in a faceoff, skaters vs. hiphop enthusiasts; trying to figure out which one cared less about the latest big deal. Shrugs after shrugs.... Admit it, you were in that fight 15 years ago. You just don't want anyone to know... That's how you got those buff shoulders! Don't lie! It's unbecoming...

If you've just thought to yourself: "yeah, I'd dropkick them too! They're just sad at their attempts at being cool." Well, let me tell you something: you're a hipster too! If you're judging people on their sad attempt of looking fashionable with clothes that were obviously weren't bought at the thrift store and their lame sense of irony, you're a hipster. I'm lame for making jokes and not knowing the latest, coolest tweeter (because blogging isn't cool anymore. Bring on tumblr!)? Yeah, you're a hipster. You're always looking for the cheapest to look like a fashionable homeless man while paying 100 bucks for tshirt that you found at that really cool shop that just opened up on Queen street? yeah, you're a  hipster. You own more than one loose knit hat and fedoras? yeah, you're a hipster...

Now, you're thinking: "Come on, that's all the underground fashionable trends right now from all the cool artists. Dude, I think I need a new skinny tie to go with my really tight skinny jeans... They're so perfect, I can't even feel the balls that I don't have"... now you're not thinking that... that's just my imagination... but truly you have...

If you've ever thought like any of the thoughts like those in http://stuffhipstershate.tumblr.com/... just even somewhere close... bad news! you need thick rimmed non-prescription glasses to complete your outfit...